[ audio ]

[buffthis]

[ The transmission comes secure on a neutral Cybertronian frequency, directed to Ratchet. ]

Ratchet, is it? The Autobot CMO? I'd heard you were on this planet.

I want to see if you're taking patients. I need some medical assistance, and I've heard you're very good. Maybe we can meet sometime to discuss it further.

Comments

[asafepairofhands]

Yeah, I bet not. [Ratchet mutters and shakes his head, but pushes up after a minute.]

Huh. All right. How do you want to do this, then? I'm sure you're sitting around somewhere nearby in your alt mode, same as I am.

[buffthis]

[ Not even going to offer his avatar a hand up, Ratchet? Haven't you studied Earth manners? Ruuuude. ]

That depends on how much of your equipment is portable. I'd rather not go back to the Autobot base camp, and I'm sure you wouldn't want to take me there -- for obvious reasons.

[asafepairofhands]

I can take a scan with what I've got on me.

[Ratchet's lip curls a little, his optics lighting.]

Goodness, I can't imagine why not. And after I heard such stellar things about Decepticon hospitality.

[buffthis]

[ w o w, ratchet ]

If you're talking about Rodimus, I took exceptional care of him. Didn't you see the work I did on his shoulder? Besides, I think you and I both know he's lucky to have made it out of there alive. No one bought his act for a moment. Not your commander's brightest move, sending that one. All things considered, I think we treated him very well.

[ He smirks, getting to his feet as well, and glances around them at the park. Not really a great place for an examination. ]

I suggest we go somewhere a little more private, then. The locals might know we're here now, but that doesn't mean I'm all that eager to leave myself open to them while I'm being examined.

[asafepairofhands]

[Ratchet snorts a short laugh at Knock Out's indignation but doesn't comment further on Rodimus' 'luck' or his poor decisions.]

I wasn't talking about Rodimus, actually. [His voice is dangerously pleasant, and he jerks his chin.] I assume you have a suggestion for where we might meet more comfortably.

[buffthis]

Hm. Orion, then? I can't see what he would have had to complain about.

[ He's actually not being a facetious turd for once. He'd treated Orion pretty well, hadn't he? And the scary jail surgery hadn't even been Knock Out's idea! ]

I'll send you to the coordinates of a discreet location just outside the city. We shouldn't be bothered by any curious passersby.

[asafepairofhands]

Well, you're right, he was only a little tortured, I can't imagine what the fuss is about.

[Ratchet's voice drops to a soft hiss at that last, his face set.]

I'll see you there. [His avatar winks out abruptly and his rumbles to life before he pulls out, headed for Knock Out's location.]

[buffthis]

[ Knock Out looks stunned at that accusation, a little too much so to react at first -- but just before Ratchet's avatar disappears his lip curls in an annoyed snarl, his eyes rolling. ]

Well, I didn't torture him!

[ Seriously, Ratchet, he hadn't even known Orion was there that time. But then Ratchet's gone, and Knock Out lets out a disgusted little huff, his own avatar blinking out.

He's waiting for Ratchet inside of an abandoned warehouse just outside the city, a short distance away from a lazy, sun-beaten truck stop. Still in his alt mode, flashy as ever, parked inside the loading bay on the ground level. ]

[asafepairofhands]

[Ratchet pulls in, catches one look at Knock Out's alt mode, then transforms to his feet as he shakes his head. He eyes Knock Out thoughtfully for a moment, thinking of that flash of genuine surprise.]

Do you know? I actually believe you. [He nods at Knock Out, fist on one hip.] C'mon, up. Let me take a look.

[buffthis]

[ Knock Out huffs a little, transforming in a showy whirl of rearranging parts, and he rolls his optics at Ratchet a little, though not as obnoxiously as I could. ]

Well, good, because I'm telling the truth. I liked Orion, you know.

[ He eyes Ratchet -- not quite warily, but certainly appraisingly. He's never met the Autobot CMO in person before. It never hurts to take stock, particularly when you're about to be at the mercy of your enemy -- and whatever Knock Out had assured him, he's more than prepared to fight if Ratchet makes it necessary. ]

Just let me know where you want to start, Doctor.

[asafepairofhands]

Kind of hard not to, honestly.

[Ratchet sizes him up as well before he beckons Knock Out a little closer.]

Come here, I'm not going to chase after you. And open a hardline port so I can get a decent scan.

[buffthis]

[ aw, Ratchet, you know what they say about all work and no play, don't you? Knock Out actually pouts just a little bit as he half-saunters toward Ratchet, flicking open a compartment under one of his arms. ]

You know, if you weren't my physician, I'd be a little offended that you didn't even buy me a drink first. [ He smirks to himself, obviously pleased. He's hilarious, okay. ] All right, then -- do your work, Ratchet. I've heard about your legendary skills for centuries now. Never thought I'd get a chance to see you work up close.

[asafepairofhands]

Yeah, and you're not going to unless you can keep quiet for fifteen consecutive seconds.

[Ratchet sounds nettled, but he's already reaching out to hook in, his optics narrowing distractedly as he does. He slides careful, sifting fingers through Knock Out's code, nudging up against firewalls and... leaving them alone, sliding harmlessly along the edge of whatever's in Knock Out's mind that he's intent on keeping private and concentrating on seeking out the malicious code. He takes as thorough a scan as he can before he draws back and disconnects, looking deeply thoughtful.]

...there. That should do it.

[buffthis]

[ Knock Out isn't exactly keen on someone else sifting through his brain, but a scan isn't a psychic patch and Ratchet can only get so much from him -- and Ratchet's preferable to Shockwave and...surprisingly respectful. Hm. Apparently you can count on Autobot principles some of the time.

Knock Out watches him sharply, attentively, optics never leaving Ratchet, and his focus brightens now that Ratchet draws back, looking expectant. ]

And? You're sure you located all of it?

[asafepairofhands]

I'm not sure of anything, I got my hands on it ten seconds ago. Give me a minute.

[Ratchet's fairly certain, though, and the longer he looks at it, the less he likes what he sees.]

...it's just humans. [His voice slow, almost thoughtful.] You're just prevented from harming the natives on this planet. That's what it does, isn't it? You lied, saying you'd be helpless in a fight with us--it doesn't apply to Cybertronians.

[buffthis]

[ Well, Knock Out had to know that lie wouldn't last forever. But it had at least gotten Ratchet to see him, so it was worth it. He looks a little annoyed at being called out on it, though, rolling his optics slightly. ]

No, but you Autobots have human allies. I don't like the idea of being defenseless against the most populous intelligent creature on this planet, and it was them that did it to me.

[asafepairofhands]

Mmmm.

[Ratchet narrows his optics slowly, and tucks the detailed copy of the code away.]

No, Knock Out, sorry--this is beyond my area of expertise. I don't believe I can help you.

[buffthis]

[ um excuse me ]

You can't, or you won't?

[asafepairofhands]

[Ratchet just meets his optics, his gaze very level.]

If that's all, I believe I'll take my leave. Sorry to have wasted your time.

[buffthis]

[ Knock Out's optics go flat, and he sure as hell doesn't get out of Ratchet's way. Yeah, he doesn't buy that you're sorry at all, Ratchet. ]

At least give me the scan.

[asafepairofhands]

[Ratchet hesitates and considers refusing... but decides it isn't worth it. He double-checks to make sure he has a local copy before he hands it over, his lips pressed to a thin line.]

Fine. You get some actual useful data, and it's just my time that was wasted, then. Whatever. Am I permitted to leave, or are you going to stab me predictably in the back now?

[buffthis]

[ Knock Out looks visibly relieved when Ratchet hands it over, although he lets out a little scoff of a laugh. Better that one of them get something out of this than nobody. Don't be so spiteful, Ratchet. ]

I told you, this has nothing to do with my being a Decepticon or your being an Autobot. Sorry to disappoint you, Doctor, but I'm afraid the end of today's meeting will be rather anticlimactic.

[ He pauses a moment, though, regarding Ratchet quite...seriously, actually. ]

There's just one more thing I'd like to ask you about. And it's not on my behalf, this time.

[asafepairofhands]

Oh? [Ratchet pauses, rolling his optics.] Yes, what favor do you think I'm going to do you out of the sweet kindness of my Autobot spark now? I'm curious.

[buffthis]

I said I'd be willing to discuss compensation, didn't I?

[ Knock Out looks a lot less flippant now, though; his expression has a sense of urgency to it. This isn't more important than getting his brain fixed, but it ranks very highly nonetheless. ]

My partner has also suffered considerably at the hands of this planet's natives. For two years he was held by an organization known as TRIDENT, and if you think badly of Decepticon hospitality --

[ He scoffs again, more harshly this time. ]

What they did was torture. He came back missing an awful lot of himself -- I've replaced what I could with what I have on hand, but I don't have a fully stocked medibay on this planet, and he's still missing an optic. I don't want you to do anything -- I just want the necessary materials to fix him. I'm not looking for favors. I'll pay you for it. I just want to fix him.

[asafepairofhands]

[Ratchet watches Knock Out narrowly, taking in the shift in his demeanor and his intent expression.]

And what would be in it for me?